Thursday, May 23, 2013

Japan: The Land Without Muslims

There are countries in the world, mainly in Europe, that are presently undergoing significant cultural transformations as a result of Muslim immigration. France, Germany, Belgium and Holland are interesting examples of cases where immigration from Muslim countries, together with the Muslims’ high fertility rate, effects every area of life.

It is interesting to know that there is a country in the world whose official and public approach to the Muslim matter is totally different. This country is Japan. This country keeps a very low profile on all levels regarding the Muslim matter: On the diplomatic level, senior political figures from Islamic countries almost never visit Japan, and Japanese leaders rarely visit Muslim countries. The relations with Muslim countries are based on concerns such as oil and gas, which Japan imports from some Muslim countries. The official policy of Japan is not to give citizenship to Muslims who come to Japan, and even permits for permanent residency are given sparingly to Muslims.

Biden asks clergy to make moral argument on guns


Biden asks clergy to make moral argument on guns
Biden met for two-and-a-half hours Monday with more than a dozen leaders from various faith communities _ Christian, Jewish, Muslim and Sikh, to name a few. Both Biden and the faith leaders encouraged each other not to give up on what has been an arduous and thus far fruitless effort by Biden and President Barack Obama to pass new gun laws in the wake of December's schoolhouse shooting in Connecticut.

I WONDER WHO WAS THERE WITH BIDEN---WHO IS BEING USED BY THE ENEMY TO DISARM AMERICA?... IF ANYONE GETS A LIST OF NAMES... PLEASE PUBLISH IT... There were some very powerful evangelical leaders in the room who needed to be reassured," said Pastor Michael McBride of the PICO National Network, a faith-based organizing network.

Citing what he described as misinformation from the National Rifle Association and others, Biden said the renewed push for gun control must correct misconceptions about what the proposals do and don't do, participants said. He asked clergy to keep up the pressure and to reframe the debate for their followers in moral terms.

A spokeswoman for Biden declined to comment on the meeting. But Rabbi Julie Schonfeld, executive vice president of the Rabbinical Assembly, said a diverse spectrum of denominations and religious orders were represented. She said they included evangelical leaders Richard Cizik and Franklin Graham, the son of evangelist Billy Graham, as well as Sister Marge Clark of Network, a Catholic group.

THIS is the best marriage advice I have seen

This is the best marriage counsel from a guy who tried and failed. I agree with EVERYTHING he says. It's really worth the read. If you are married, thinking about marriage or are having difficulty, this will open your eyes... if you are a man.  IF you are a woman, give the link TO your man.

Wonderful read.

When it's all Painful - Relationships

I spent last weekend with a large group of people.  During that time I had opportunity to interact with 22 people for many hours.  Personalities are interesting. I met a woman about my age who has been widow for two years.  How that has affected her.  In another case a couple who's son was injured badly and are very bitter.  Bitterness has poisoned their life.

Life isn't about what happens to us, but about our reaction to it.  One woman I met in her late 40s looks 70 because of the bitterness that has consumed her.  Everything is someone else's fault.  She is always the victim, always right, goes off on everyone.  Volatile.  Believes that if people would just listen to her life would be perfect. The life she has today is exactly as her words have constructed.  In turmoil. The classic toxic person.  A Poster Child for James Allen's essay, "As a Man Thinketh".

Unfortunately if you are married to or live with someone like that, there is no escape short of the drastic actions of the courts.

Proverbs 22:
24Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person,
do not associate with one easily angered,
25or you may learn their ways
and get yourself ensnared.
What is interesting is the children I met of these people are often more kind and loving.  They have had to develop personalities capable of working around the toxicity.  The cycle of personality is often that a passive parent produces aggressive toxic children and the aggressive toxic parents produce more tolerant and passive children.  Every other generation extremes.  Unbalanced.

I wish it weren't so.  I wish well balanced people would produce well balanced people.  Sometimes it does.  Not often enough.  I look at my own life and wonder about the result of what I have produced in offspring, in work, in relationships, in families, in leadership roles.  I have not been good in this. 

It took 3 days to detox after last weekend.  It shouldn't be like that.  Life is too short.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

100 traits of people who should NOT be in your life... toxic people

  1. They have grandiose air about them, boasting and bragging about how wonderful that they are.
  2. Flatter you by giving you an inordinate amount of attention, money or time early-on in the relationship.
  3. Cannot admit faults or flaws. Says, "I don't have any," and means it seriously.
  4. Not true to values and norms of society; lacking character.
  5. Disrespect you, do not return your call(s), ignore you, avoid you.
  6. Refuse to deal with issues in the relationship that you bring up.
  7. Blame you when you're upset because of something they did to you.
  8. Overly agreeable at first.
  9. Try to make you feel guilty when you're concerned over something they did to disrespect you.
  10. Mimic you.
  11. Put you down. 
  12. Blames world for their problems. 
  13. Show up late for appointments or cancel at the last minute. 
  14. Expect you to always come to them, rather than give-and-take.
  15. Does not listen to your concerns about the relationship or interactions.
  16. They are actively addicted to drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, etc... 
  17. They need an inordinate amount of attention or high regard from those around them.
  18. They are continually worried about position or rank.
  19. They are overly competitive.
  20. They put you down in any way. 
  21. Try to make you envious by rubbing your nose in their good fortune.
  22. Seem to be envious of you.
  23. Set-up outings with your other friends without inviting you.
  24. Try to create triangles by involving 3rd parties into your disagreements. 
  25. Talk behind your back or gossip about others. 
  26. Continually down, depressed and having catastrophes.
  27. Try to leave you out of the crowd.
  28. Refuse to acknowledge your needs.
  29. Fail to look you in the eye when you're talking. (Look over your shoulder at others instead.)
  30. Lack compassion for what you're going through.
  31. Refuse to share about themselves equally. 
  32. Label you or stereotype you.
  33. Refuse to acknowledge mistakes. 
  34. Refuse to apologize for wrongs. 
  35. Acts entitled to special treatment. 
  36. Manipulative.
  37. Tells lies, exaggerates constantly. 
  38. Down plays your accomplishments.
  39. By your side when you're down, then withdraws from you when you're doing well.
  40. Defensive about everything you do. 
  41. Refuse to validate your perception of reality. 
  42. Attempt to tell you how you feel or tell you how you are. 
  43. Constantly criticizing.
  44. Acts like they worship the ground you walk on one day, then like you don't exist the next. 
  45. Makes you feel worthless. 
  46. Orders you or bosses you around. 
  47. Is overly reliant on parents or another person. 
  48. Won't go out of their way for you, even when you go out of your way for them. 
  49. Ignore your texts, emails or calls at any time. (Big sign of disrespect!)
  50. Does not support you.
  51. Belittles your ambitions. 
  52. Speaks negatively about your friends, job, life. 
  53. Acts like he or she is always in a hurry, with very little time for you.
  54. Acts as though he or she is doing you a favor by talking to you or listening to you.
  55. Treats you as less than if you do not prescribe to their dogma, religion or doctrine. 
  56. Talks bad about those who are mentally ill, sick or hurting. 
  57. Tries to turn you into their administrative assistant (call to remind me, pick-up my cleaning).
  58. Confusing attitudes that change day-by-day.
  59. Does not keep word. 
  60. Seems to be more interested in power than in relationship.
  61. Seems to be more concerned about what others think than about your relationship. 
  62. Treats you as though he or she is angry, without giving explanation. 
  63. Knowingly makes comments that are contrary to your convictions.
  64. Tries to change you. 
  65. Insults your body, clothing, personality or anything about you. 
  66. Not available when you need him or her most. 
  67. Cannot talk about anything other than surface, materialistic or vain topics. 
  68. Does not share information with you that they have that may help you excel in life.
  69. Constantly complains or whines.
  70. Has anger issues, rages, hates.
  71. Plays games.
  72. Judgmental
  73. Continues to ask the same question after you've told them you don't want to answer it. 
  74. Chews you out for no reason. 
  75. Controlling
  76. Uses money or flattery to control you.
  77. Tells you what to do, how to think, what to feel.
  78. Tells you one thing, then denies she said it.
  79. Brings up your faults, flaws or past mistakes.
  80. Brings up topics every time you see them that they know you'd rather not discuss.
  81. Blows up, flies off handle for no reason.
  82. Always needs to be in the center of attention.
  83. Cool toward you when you succeed, get attention or look good.
  84. Taker
  85. Challenges everything you say.
  86. Negative
  87. Black or white thinking - no gray area.
  88. Moves too fast, wants to become instant friends, lovers, in relationship.
  89. Ignores your boundaries. 
  90. Exploits you.
  91. Idealizes you.
  92. Acts pompous towards you.
  93. Acts condescending towards you.
  94. Agrees with your adversaries instead of supporting you.
  95. Acts like they know more than you, better than you about what you need to do in your life. 
  96. Bitter, vindictive or vengeful.
  97. Selfish, stingy.
  98. Rushes you.
  99. Withholds affection
  100. Kicks you when you're down.  
A toxic person can be anyone. A friend, a parent, a sibling, a teacher, a boss or a co-worker. No matter who it is that is toxic in your life, you must set up strong boundaries against them, and potentially remove yourself from their life.  You cannot change them. The tactics of a toxic person siphons away your self-esteem. Life is too short to be depleted by another person. You need all of yourself possible to live your life and grow as a person.

"Life is just too short to put up with a kicking cow"

When you come to the point where you know you MUST separate yourself from someone who is toxic in your life, do it.  I long ago made the decision that life is too short to put up with a kicking cow. You don't know the story?

A farmer had a prize milk cow. It would produce twice as much milk as any cow in the county. People would come and marvel at the output. She was a pride of the dairy industry. There was only one problem. She had a bad habit of KICKING the farmer across the barn every time he knelt to milk her. She never missed. Seemed to enjoy it. One day his wife heard a noise. Went to the barn and found the cow dead with a gun in the farmers hand. She said, "WHY would you kill the prize cow, your best producer?" He said, "Life is just too short to put up with a kicking cow". I won't. Neither should you. No matter how productive they are... if they kick you every time.. time to call time out and out with them. This is a management principle worth knowing.
That's right.


I cut this from a facebook post.... I think it's over the top...but sorta hard in truth


We Are the Idiots

Our continued acceptance of environmentalist manipulation, lies and fear-mongering has led Congress to establish deadly public policies in the name of saving energy -- such as Corporate Average Fuel Economy standards, which downsize autos and cause unnecessary highway fatalities. That's on top of the stupid 1970s 55 mph laws. The next time an environmentalist warns us of a pending disaster or that we are running out of something, we ought to ask: When was the last time a prediction of yours was right? Some people are inclined to call these people idiots. That's wrong. They have been successful in their agenda. It's we who are the idiots for listening to them and allowing Congress to let them have their way.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Wimps Versus Barbarians

Without a moral framework, there is nothing left but immediate self-indulgence by some and the path of least resistance by others. Neither can sustain a free society. Disruptive activists indulge their egos in the name of idealism and others cave rather than fight.

It's not just academics who won't defend decency. Trustees could fire college presidents who cave in to storm trooper tactics. Donors could stop donating to institutions that have sold out their principles to appease the campus barbarians. But when nobody is willing to defend civilized standards, the barbarians win.

Whether on college campuses or among nations on the world stage, if the battle comes down to the wimps versus the barbarians, the barbarians are bound to win.

Monday, May 20, 2013

Denial and Avoidance Won’t Fix Housing or Grow Economy - Mandelman Matters

 I wish we’d stop with the false bottoms and imaged recovery stories so we could actually concentrate on making some much needed improvements in how we’re handling our economic malaise, because that’s the only way we’re going to see any actual improvement in our quality of life.
Denial may help us sleep for a few nights, like giving a drunk alcohol makes him or her feel better too… but it’s always short lived and the hangovers only get worse when we wake up and discover that nothing substantive has changed.
Denial and Avoidance Won’t Fix Housing or Grow Economy - Mandelman Matters

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Thinking About Paying Off Your Mortgage Before Retirement? Consider This First |

 Wouldn't it be great to pay off that mortgage before you retire?  But that might not be your best financial move.
Jane Clark, from Kiplinger's Personal Finance, gave us some steps to consider first, including paying off our consumer debt (see the list below).
"You're probably paying a lot more for your consumer debt on your credit cards than you would be on your mortgage. Mortgage rates are probably below 5% now and so you could be paying 13%, 14%, 15% on your credit card balance. It doesn't make sense to keep that debt and pay off your mortgage," said Clark.

Thinking About Paying Off Your Mortgage Before Retirement? Consider This First |