Know the NO-MAN

No I didn’t miss a letter. Not SNOWMAN, NO-MAN. I mean it intentionally. I’m talking about the person who always says NO, or not now, or “we’ll see” anything less than yes towards a fresher vision. The person who is always cautious, always negative, always naysaying, always looking for the proven way, always looking for others to take a chance before he or she will move out and take a position.

I’ll be blunt. I have zero respect for those kinds of people. I won’t mention any names, I had a coworker 20 years ago who’s only contribution or lack of it to the corporation I was vested to operate was telling me I shouldn’t do this or that, or that what I was about to do wouldn’t work, or that the strategy I was engaged in he had tried before and it failed and a hundred other things he naysaid to make himself look smart.

Meanwhile in 30 months I helped turned that company around from losing $50,000 a month to earning that much per month. He had had his chance for years before that. His timidity and fear was a straightjacket he put on the organization. Years after I left the firm he became CEO, the job I had left. He lasted less than 2 years and left in defeat. Fear and NO is a lousy way to lead.

Helen Keller, who was born deaf, dumb and blind said this, “Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is a daring adventure or nothing at all.”

When’s the last time you heard anyone in politics, corporate leadership (public corporations) or journalism say anything close to that? We live in a culture of cowards. It’s even invaded the church. Courage is rare.

The leader who holds back everyone with his can’t do attitude does so because he is guarding himself against anything going wrong. Cowardice is perceived as a safe harbor against blame, ownership of a difficult situation and sometimes against having to do actual work.

In a former post I quoted Jared Sandberg when he wrote of this syndrome. He wrote that the NO-MAN or NO-WOMAN may be caught up in his or he sense of superiority. He would LIKE others to believe he is a perfectionist and thinks a YES would be relaxing his authority. Teresa Amabile, a professor of Business Administration at Harvard says negative feedback and holding off on things until they die is in fact that leaders use when they feel intellectually insecure.

Her study shows that some workers perceive criticisms as smarter than praise. Perpetual critics may be views as smarter than the approvers even when the circumstances and facts prove out otherwise. Some people who are born followers, she says, are hardwired to pay more attention to criticism and negative stimuli.

When I taught Dale Carnegie the FIRST rule of motivation was, Don’t Criticize, Condemn or Complain. Any fool can criticize, be negative and naysaying; and most fools are.

Naysayers deflate motivation and bring progress and productivity to a grinding halt in order to protect their egos. When management consultants do an evaluation of a corporation, they say that behind every NO is a scardy-cat.

Saying YES to anything takes risk. Risk takes Courage. Saying no requires no effort at all; even a child can do it.

The first word most infants learn is ___________. You knew that.

If I hit a nerve and you said OUCH, it’s time to grow up.