Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Standing around like all the other doofuses on the night before Valentines Day

Tomorrow is Valentines Day.  It is required as the male of the species to invest a few bucks in a Card or candy or flowers for your significant female other on this day.  It's in the rules.

So, tonight at 5:30PM I trotted off to the Hallmark Store.  Men of all shapes and sizes were there.  We all took the mark of the beast which in this case is the shape of a heart, and stood in front of a well picked over card rack to find that "Just Right" card as the clock ticked to 6. 

I say the mark of the beast because biblically no man can buy or sell lest he have the mark of the beast, and none of us were there under our own power.  We were marked with love, marked with guilt and marked me destined to buy adequate stuff for the sweet one in our life.

These men were typical of those I see every year about this time.  I think we are brothers of the late heart.

No real hurry you understand.  So, I looked around, guys with plumbers shirt and Mike as a name, guys who worked construction, a guy about my age who was in deep weeds, guys who were distinctively out of their element.

I recall a few years ago when Grimms was the hallmark store too.  We all descended at the appointed time to pay our $3.95 voluntary oblation and go home.  It was nearly 6.  The rack had like 8 cards left on them.  4 were inappropriately "Funny".  One gushy beyond the pale.  And 3 weren't horribly offensive.

Those of us left stood and looked at these cards, they were by then well shop worn.  Many formerly grease stained hands had examined and rejected them during the day.

To say beggars can't be choosers applies here is understatement.

I bought one, as did all the others.  The owner of the shop was finding stock as fast as he could.  I swear he was scratching out "Happy Birthday" and writing in some cursive Valentines Day.

Fortunately my dear wife loves me.  If I brought home a used lottery ticket with happy valentines day scribbled on the back she wouldn't love me less.

I get to pretend I'm this great romantic because I have such a wonderful wife.  Why she puts up with me, I'll never know, but I do know, for that I am very happy.

 

 

 

2 comments:

Steve Scott said...

Gene, I went yesterday, at my wife's request to buy Valentine's for our boys - I secretly bought for her - and stood there with all the women. They're smarter than we are and buy a day early!

Anonymous said...

You're a good man, Gene.
And not a bad storyteller to boot.