I went to work for an organization where the boss was one of the most critical men I ever knew. No one did anything right. Everyone was an idiot. The worst was, I knew full well that if he talked about others in that way to me, he talked about me that way to others. I never trusted him.
I’m not afraid of criticism. I take it well and hope to learn from it. It’s when someone blows off and berates another person, even to his face that makes the critic small in my and everyone’s else’s eyes.
I have always hated the phrase that started, “I have a little constructive criticism for you”. It’s never constructive and I wish they would hold their tongue. I’m not perfect, I can think of several good sound relationships I have damaged by my sharp tongue. I’m now certain there is no such thing as constructive criticism.
To be condemning of another person for their actions is about the same. I learned long ago not to judge. When I see someone do something I don’t understand, I always think of something my old friend Loehle Gast used to say, “treat everyone as if their heart were breaking because in some way or another it probably is”. That’s why the word IDIOT attached to someone for their actions is hard for me. We don’t know or understand their motivations. If someone is late for work, questions not condemnations will accomplish more. If someone steps out of line in a meeting or social situation, be triply forgiving.
The last is a person who complains constantly about things. We are responsible in part for the answer to every prayer we pray. We are responsible in part for a solution as far as we can for every complaint we lodge. I’m not talking about being a doormat. I’m talking about asking, poking, pulling, questioning. When it becomes complaining, it’s too much.
Any fool can criticize, condemn or complain and most fools do. Don’t be a fool. Be supportive, helpful, encouraging and prod for excellence.
In Short:
Don’t be critical to another person
Never condemn another person for what they say or do
Complaining will get you nowhere
Don’t criticize condemn or complain
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