The 2006 Congressional Elections are coming up. The two main parties are getting their talking points in order. From correspondent KLR in our east coast Bureau we have this inside information on the respective platforms thus far:
Republican:
Four out of five rednecks and white trash agree... Vote Republican
Lets give the rest of the world and the environment the third index of our right hand again.
We make the rich richer.
Next time, we're liberating Canada.
We just about got that whole Israel/Palestinian peace accord thingy figured out.
"Yeah, I got your Weapon-of-Mass-Destruction right here, huh...its right here..."
Congressmen and Senators make better Lap dogs if they’re Republicans
Where's my spine, I know I left it somewhere?
Democrat:
We're the lesser of two evils like: BUSH – ROVE – CHENEY – DELAY - LOTT
Fresh New faces of “not as evil” to get used to: Maxine Waters, Charlie Rangle, Howard Dean, Ray Nagin, and Mary Landrieu.
We're the best way to shut Michael Moore up.
We'll not only legalize gay marriage, we'll ban straight marriage.
Think "Chief-of-Staff Morgan Freeman" in 2008. Sure he's just an actor , but so was Ronald Reagan.
We've found the solution for low taxes.
We kinda miss the days when Rush Limbaugh was relevant.
Our guy dated Marilyn Monroe. How many American icons have they dated (if you know what I mean)?
And how bout that Monica. OOOOO Babeolishous sort of.
Don’t you miss us as all? Please, We’ll promise you anything. Just vote for us. You won't be sorry.
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