This is dangerous and not very holy ground.
I have a blog acquaintance who I have admired for some time as a clever talented writer.
She has been bemoaning her fate along with her friend about how hard it is to meet someone with marriage intentions and maybe even have a family.
I have read both dissertations and am not without some empathy. Yet, I walk thru malls, in parks, at the library and on the street and see some of the most odd parings you can imagine. Ugly men with beautiful women can be rooted in the ultimate sex appeal component, a fat wallet. I get that.
Yet I see women, misshapen, unattractive women who are married apparently happily to men who while not Brad Pitt, could have if looks were a measure, done much better.
I ask myself this all the time. How did this happen?
I have been a man. Still last I looked am one. I know what it's like to be come on to by a woman of less than attractiveness. If she is good at what she does she will make me feel important, attractive, sexy, bright, clever, funny, admired even worshiped. She will find my ego soft spot and stroke it carefully. She will not bite. She will be safe. She will be able to carry on a great conversation and do so without trying to even up the score all the time.
This is the nature of the woman who finds a good man when more attractive brighter women are left in the cold.
I am a fan of the Play Julius Cesar by Shakespeare. As Cassius says to Brutus:
"Men at some time are masters of their fates:
The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,
But in ourselves, that we are underlings." --Shakespeare, Julius Caesar
I have no desire to pile on guilt, but if you are going to make friends, you must be a friend. If you are going to find a soul mate you must be a soul mate. There are thousands of lonely bachelors who want to find someone to share life with on the planet, even in North Dakota.
They want to preserve their fragile egos. If you come across as porcupine they will keep their emotional distance. (Encounters with Porcupines hurt most times)
I know from personal family experience that any woman who wants to meet a man of 30 plus will have to be the initiator. They aren't going to come ask you to dance. That day passed them (and you) by. They are single because no one asked them to dance. If you read too many Jane Austen novels you believe that the fresh faced 19 year old is you. NOPE. Not any more.
Heathcliff is going to need to be approached. He is unmarried and unattached because he's shy or has been hurt by other women. Bitten once, twice shy.
The gravitationally overdone less than perfect in the eyes of others girl down the street has no hang ups about going and smiling in his frightened face and carrying him down the aisle. The former paragraph was modified to meet the requirements of the politically correct police. And yes I am still a prophet, just maybe not a politically correct prophet.
Time to be a little aggressive here.
The rules have changed.
I'm sure I will now get hate mail on this. I have couched this so only the person who could read this will know it's about them. Others need not apply.
5 comments:
You are not the only type of fish in the sea, thank goodness. I know plenty of men who love a woman with some bite, some spunk, some spark and are not afraid to debate and discuss on a regular basis. You'd probably use the b-word for such women and find the intellectual and emotional challenge of them to be a turn off. And she doesn't have to couch it in fake tact or shift her opinion to sooth his ego to appeal to these other kind of men. I am such a strong woman and have never lacked for attention. In fact most attention comes from men that I have challenged on an issue, then we got to be friends discussing other issues, then . . .
I am not that fish.
It's not about a woman with bite or spark.
Or one who can discuss on a regular basis.
It's about a person who is perpetually wounded, offended and hurt by everything anyone says that is tiresome and off putting.
I have a word for those women who want a relationship but are intent for those who want to meet someone but are not afraid to go for the throat. It's not what you said. It's alone.
I like strong women. Always have. Always sought them out. But mean cruel and heartless is not strong. It's just mean. There IS a difference.
That's the porcupine I described.
I'm glad you see yourself as strong. I hope others do as well. OR are you in fact not strong but just cranky. Opinionated and not particularly attractive (attention getting).
I know women who have no such charms physically but who are so wonderful to be around, so encouraging and so caring I have just wanted to take them home.
You probably aren't that person.
Pity.
Excuse me, "the fat ugly girl"
Certainly those are words that a "prophet of God" uses about another human being.
What is wrong with you?
My cousin had a transplant and is "fat" because of her drugs she takes. Her body is very puffy and she has had her share with people saying cruel comments. How dare you make such comments about another human being.
The fact you call yourself a "prophet" is just laughable. I am sure that Mother Theresa called her workers and fellow Catholic order "fat and ugly girls" as they were cleaning the sores of the "ugly girls" that were Lepers. Seriously man, what is wrong with you? Please leave your name off of Christianity because I cannot fathom my pastor or priest calling anyone "fat and ugly girls". I really do not know what else to say, I am speechless........
Run thru with the PC cusinart.
Still says the same thing.
Prophet Gene
Since my last post was a little too harsh for the topic, and after thinking about it and taking a breather, let me try again. Let Mr. G say he is a prophet, who am I to decide whether or not he is. If it is not doing any harm physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually to you Anon, what harm is it. Let the man be.
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